So... it's been forever and a month since i last updated. obviously I've had a pretty good reason to be otherwise occupied, and i want to share with you the sweetest success I've had in my life so far, my beautiful, strong, healthy, and incredibly inspiring daughter, Alexandra! She's 11.5 weeks old, and i just can't say enough about her, like any new mother. i guess i feel like it's different for me in some ways because i had to wait and *WORK* so hard to have her. I'm not talking about the 57 hours of labor, 51 of which i had no anaesthesia during- that's a whole other post. I'm talking about the 6 years, 7 months, and 25 days i spent between when we decided to try for a baby and the moment i got to hold her in my arms. I'm talking about all the hard work you've read about on this blog, and all the changes Scott and i have made in our lives in a million areas to prepare for this gift. all of it, great and small, was and is worth it. She's amazing y'all! Big sparkly blue (for now at least) eyes, tons of dark hair that has curl to it, Scott's nose and lips, my eye shape, ears, and dimples when she flashes the prettiest smile I've ever seen- which is often! She has her daddy's long fingers, so i see music in her future.right now she's sitting in her swing, yawning, and watching me type, her eyelids drooping. she loves to see and discover things. she hates to miss anything. she is my inspiration and motivation. i want to be for her the best mama and the best example of a strong and godly woman. i want her to know it's OK to not have it all together all the time, it's OK to cry when your heart hurts, and i want to show her where to take her hurts and let the One who knows her even better than i do heal them. i want all the best for her- i want to BE the best for her- i want her to know a lot younger than i did how strong God has made her body and the reward of keeping it healthy. i want her to see me exercising and loving it and know that it's not a punishment but a rewarding thing to get stronger and healthier so we can be our best every day. i want her to see beauty in how she is made, whether she's curvy like her mama or long and lean like her Aunt Kelly, or somewhere in between, she is beautiful, and as long as she is taking good care of the body she's been given, she has no need to change a thing. she's only 2 months old, but the past week or so, as I've been thinking of and working toward getting myself back on track to reach my personal goals, I've thought of making exercise something we do together, just like when i tell her about what I'm eating and how yummy it is and what it does for my body. i am going to get myself back in gear for my own sake, to take care of myself and be the best i can for me- but just like before she was conceived, I'm doing it for Lexi too. to be an example, to be the healthiest i can physically, mentally, emotionally, so as she grows, Sweet Success can be ours together.
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